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Review: Illuminae: The Illuminae Files_01 by Amie Kaufman and Jay Kristoff

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Ezra Mason: Yeah. So all hell breaks loose, and Kady is yelling at me and I’m yelling back. All this stuff that’d been building up for the last year and boiling just under the skin. Like, I loved her. I love her. But she had this way of just . . . It was so stupid. The world is ending all around us and we’re screaming about college applications and commitment and $%!*&. I mean, can you believe that?

Interviewer: You’re seventeen, right?

Ezra Mason: Almost eighteen.

Interviewer: Then yes, I believe it.

Ezra Mason: Cold, chum. Real cold.

For an Illuminae-cover inspired Coconut Cream Fruit Tart recipe, click here.

5/5 stars

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Recipe: Coconut Cream Fruit Tart

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I loved Illuminae so much (in case you didn’t pick that up from my review), that despite there being rare mentions of food, I wanted to feature it. I chose a summery-fresh fruit tart inspired by the book’s cover. I used a combination of strawberries, raspberries, clementines, and mango. There’s a lot of flexibility here and you can use any of your favorite fruits.

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Recipe: Tomatillo-Cilantro Bean Salad

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“By morning, Lorelai was strong enough to get up and eat breakfast without help. Gabril boiled a small pot of beans and sliced the last of the apples they’d stolen from the queen’s garrison. She ate the beans but ignored the apples.”

I sided with Lorelai and forwent the obvious choice of an apple dish to coincide with this Snow White re-telling by C.J. Redwine. I got so tired of hearing about the gross beans Lorelai and company were dining on every meal.

“Lorelai shoved a spoonful of beans into her mouth. They were hot and tasteless.”

I submit that with a bit of foraging, Gabriel really could have elevated those beans to a fresh, crunchy, delectable meal.

For my review of The Shadow Queen, click here.

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Review: The Shadow Queen by C.J. Redwine

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“The faint aroma of apples filled the air, and the lingering stain of rot smeared the teeth of those who smiled at Irina.”

The apples in this book never sounded appealing. For a non-apple recipe that Loralei and company could have taken on the road, click here.

3/5 stars

The Story:

A Snow White re-telling with a few twists, though it stays fairly close to the classic. After the Evil Queen overtakes her kingdom, Princess Loralei becomes a fugitive determined to win back her crown.

I liked this book more than I expected to. It was an entertaining, quick read. I did dock it a few stars for gaps in the plot, a deus ex machine, if you will…. …though I suppose anyone being saved from death by true love’s kiss is a deus ex machina? Mostly, I was disappointed with the Evil Queen’s characterization. The effort was there, but no follow through.

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Recipe: Hazelnut Apple Strudel

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“Entering the recommended cafe, Maisie took a seat. When the young waitress approached, she ordered a coffee with hot milk and some apple strudel. She was very hungry. Soon the waitress returned to the table, using the palm of her free hand to smooth out the white embroiled tablecloth.” 

Click here for my review of Jacqueline Winspear’s Journey to Munich.

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Review: Journey to Munich (Maisie Dobbs #12) by Jacqueline Winspear

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The desk clerk took Maisie’s Baedecker guide, opened the map inside, and lifted his pencil. “May I?” 

“Of course,” said Maisie. “I need to know where I’m going.” 

Flourishing the pencil, the clerk marked the place where Maisie could board a tram and the point at which she should step off. He told her where to walk, and made a note in the margin of his favorite coffeehouse, where he informed her that she could buy a slice of the very best apple strudel. Maisie thanked the man and set off.

For a Maisie-inspired apple strudel recipe, click here.

5/5 stars

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Recipe: “Nightshade’s” Drool-Worthy Pizza Sauce

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“What are you doing?” Emma asked.

“Ordering pizza from Nightshade’s,” said Malcom. “There’s an app.”

“A what?” said Dru.

“Nightshade?” Livvy turned around. “The vampire?”

“He owns a pizza place. The sauce is divine,” Malcolm said, kissing his own fingers.

“Aren’t you worried what’s in it?” said Livvy.

Click here for my review of Cassandra Clare’s latest installment in the Shadowhunter saga, Lady Midnight.

Did anyone else notice how many times the Blackthorns ordered Nightshade pizza? Was anyone else craving pizza with an out-of-this-world sauce? You will suspect addictive demon powders have been slipped into this sauce.

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Review: Lady Midnight by Cassandra Clare (The Dark Artifices, #1)

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“All right, enough,” said Jules. “We’re taking a break from killings and profiles for dinner.” He took the boxes from Emma, shooting her a grateful look, and set them down on the coffee table. “I don’t care what you all want to talk about, it just can’t involve murder or blood. Any blood.”

“But it’s vampire pizza,” Livvy pointed out.

“Immaterial,” Julian said. “Couch. Now.”

For a pizza + sauce recipe that will have you raving over how it could possibly be so good, click here.

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Recipe: Coconut Pancakes with Fresh Pineapple-Ginger Syrup

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Clary spoke up hastily. “What’s all the raw meat for?” she asked, indicating the third page of her menu.

“Werewolves,” said Jace. “Though I don’t mind a bloody steak myself every once in a while.” He reached across the table and flipped Clary’s menu over. “Human food is on the back.” 

…Clary, after a moment’s hesitation, chose a large coffee and coconut pancakes. The waitress winked a blue eye at her and flounced off. 

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Recipe: Oreo Cupcakes

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All right – I have a sneaking suspicion that you’re not 100% committed to your Oreo diet. The guidelines are really pretty basic. No excuses. Breakfast is obviously an Oreo granola bar or Oreo Pop-Tart. No, they’re not gross. Shut up. They’re amazing. Lunch should be Oreo pizza with an Oreo milk shake and a couple of those Oreo truffles my mom makes (a.k.a. the most delicious freaking things in the universe). Dinner is deep-fried Oreos served on top of Oreo ice cream, and for a drink, it’s Oreos dissolved in milk. No water. Only Oreo milk. Dessert can be Oreos straight up. Sound reasonable? It’s for your health, Blue.

For my review of Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda, click here!

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