“All right, enough,” said Jules. “We’re taking a break from killings and profiles for dinner.” He took the boxes from Emma, shooting her a grateful look, and set them down on the coffee table. “I don’t care what you all want to talk about, it just can’t involve murder or blood. Any blood.”
“But it’s vampire pizza,” Livvy pointed out.
“Immaterial,” Julian said. “Couch. Now.”
For a pizza + sauce recipe that will have you raving over how it could possibly be so good, click here.
Clary spoke up hastily. “What’s all the raw meat for?” she asked, indicating the third page of her menu.
“Werewolves,” said Jace. “Though I don’t mind a bloody steak myself every once in a while.” He reached across the table and flipped Clary’s menu over. “Human food is on the back.”
…Clary, after a moment’s hesitation, chose a large coffee and coconut pancakes. The waitress winked a blue eye at her and flounced off.
All right – I have a sneaking suspicion that you’re not 100% committed to your Oreo diet. The guidelines are really pretty basic. No excuses. Breakfast is obviously an Oreo granola bar or Oreo Pop-Tart. No, they’re not gross. Shut up. They’re amazing. Lunch should be Oreo pizza with an Oreo milk shake and a couple of those Oreo truffles my mom makes (a.k.a. the most delicious freaking things in the universe). Dinner is deep-fried Oreos served on top of Oreo ice cream, and for a drink, it’s Oreos dissolved in milk. No water. Only Oreo milk. Dessert can be Oreos straight up. Sound reasonable? It’s for your health, Blue.
For my review of Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda, click here!
Blue,
Okay, first of all, Oreos absolutely qualify as a food group. Second of all, they’re the ONLY food group that matters. My sisters and I actually made up this place called the Shoreo a few years ago one night when we were staying at our aunt’s house. It’s like this place where everything is made of some kind of Oreo, and the river is an Oreo milk shake, and you sit on top of this massive Oreo and float down it. You get to scoop up cups of milk shake whenever you want. It’s kind of like that scene in Willy Wonka, I guess.
For my Oreo-obsessed Simon inspired cupcake recipe, click here.
She kicked Chaol in the ribs with a sock-covered foot. “All I’m saying is that I’d like some chocolate cake every now and then.”
He closed his eyes. “And an apple tart, and a loaf of bread, and a pot of stew, and a mountain of cookies, and a—“He chuckled as she put her foot against his face and pushed. He grabbed her foot and wouldn’t let go when she tried yanking her leg back. “It’s true, and you know it, Laena.”
“So what if it is? Haven’t I earned the right to eat as much as I want, whenever I want?” She wrenched her foot out of his grasp as the smile faded from his face.
“Yes,” he said quietly, his voice barely audible over the crackling fire. “You have.” After a few moments of silence, he stood up and walked to the door.
She sat up on her elbows. “Where are you going?”
He opened the door. “To get you chocolate cake.”
For a Crown of Midnight review, click here.
“Is that…chocolate cake?”
“I thought you might need some.”
“Need, not want?”
A ghost of a smile was on her lips, and he almost sagged in relief as he said, “For you, I’d say that chocolate cake is most definitely a need.”
Click here for a Crown of Midnight inspired chocolate cake recipe.
Click here for a review of the first book in the series, Throne of Glass.
At the cost of nearly her life, Celaena has won the title of champion. Now she’s her enemy’s assassin, dispatched to remove the King of Adarlan’s dissenters. She’s living luxuriously off her blood money in the glass castle, but her friend Nehemia won’t allow her to enjoy these comforts, and neither will Celaena’s conscience. It’s time for Celaena to decide whose side she’s truly on and her reluctance to choose will come at a price.
“She [Nina] shoved one of the cakes from the coffee service into her mouth …”
Nina was always eating sweets and was especially enamored with cake. I set out to make one that would have her salivating. For a Six of Crows book review, click here.
5/5 stars
For a Nina-inspired cake recipe, click here.
Cruel mob boss Kaz Brekker has a new job: break into the most impenetrable prison ever built. Enlisting the help of five other criminals from the Ketterdam slums, the six are staging a heist that will make them rich beyond their wildest dreams. The journey strains Kaz, though, breaking through his armor to reveal a seventeen-year-old vulnerable boy with a haunting past. … Continue reading
4/5 stars
“I’ll spend the rest of the evening enjoying a potato. And by ‘enjoying’ I mean ‘hating so much I want to kill people.’”
For a baked potato recipe significantly better than anything Mark Watney enjoyed, click here.
Mark Watney has been abandoned on Mars. Accidentally. Now, he must figure out a way to survive for four years until the next NASA mission to Mars. Watney proves to be the McGyver of space, constantly rigging solutions to his increasingly deadly obstacles. … Continue reading
“I started the day with some nothin’ tea. Nothin’ tea is easy to make. First, get some hot water, then add nothin’. I experimented with potato skin tea a few weeks ago. The less said about that the better.” —The Martian by Andy Weir
For my review of The Martian, click here.
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